Sex Talk Wednesday - Let's Talk Softcore

Before I knew about hardcore xxx movies, I was a big fan of the softcore flicks out there. And when I say softcore, I'm not talking about the stuff that shows EVERYTHING but the "money shot". I'm referring to the movies that were on late night cable and had the disclaimer "The following feature contains material of an adult nature and is intended for mature audiences only. Parents may wish to consider whether children under 18 should view this material. HBO will show this feature only at night." (Hey, I think I may have that word for word...and from memory!) So this post is dedicated to a few of the finer points of some of my favorite softcore movies that even NOT having seen in over a decade (and in some cases, TWO decades), I still remember fondly.

Malibu Express
This was my first Andy Sidaris movie where I decided that ALL adult features should be by him. He had the perfect setup going in my opinion. Action flick with mega eye candy for both girls and guys where everyone ends up having sex at one point or another in the movie and actually has a pretty decent story. Malibu Express is about our hero, Cody, who is a P.I. and is trying to solve a murder. While he is interrogating everyone at the estate, all of the women are literally taking their clothes off for him. (I'm sure he's considered a good-looking guy, but frankly, blonds don't do much for me. He resembles Alan Jackson quite a bit...oh, and one of my teachers in high school.) Anyway, he's having a difficult time getting the mystery solved because of all these women throwing themselves at him and I'm pretty sure he has sex with all of them one by one and in one scene there are two girls in the shower at the same time. No one really noteworthy in it except for Kimberly Arthur who at the time was the hot babe on Hugh Hefner's arm. Not sure if she's still in the picture with him or not. Don't really care. Just interesting that she's probably the only recognizable name except for Sybil Danning. The reason this movie sticks out in my mind is because of the scene between Shane and Liza in the shower. He had set up the camera on a timer and took off all his clothes and surprised her in the shower and she resisted him - at first - but with his soothing yet controlling voice and forceful body language, they ended up having REALLY HOT SEX in the shower. I know there are more explicit scenes out there but DAMN this was HOT! Looking back on it now, it probably explains a lot of things about me. :] That's better left ended there. :] If you find that you like this type of movie, a couple of other good ones by Andy Sidaris are Hard Ticket To Hawaii (featuring one of the former Frederick's of Hollywood lingerie models) and Picasso Trigger which probably has the best storyline of all of them.

Love Scenes
Ahh....we're talking sex with strangers now. Or should I say an example of a wife willing to do ANYTHING for her husband to make him happy. He's directing a film and he wants her to be in it but when he finds out that she had a fling with one of the actors he had worked with before, the husband decides to cast that guy as the main role that she will act opposite from and as the movie is filmed, the husband keeps changing what the movie is about until it becomes a sex flick and she and her former flame are now having REAL sex for the camera (even to the point where she has her first orgasm-she had been faking with her husband for years) and the husband is getting off on it. The scene besides the first on-camera orgasm she has with the actor that is most memorable is where she is tied to the four-poster bed and her lover is kissing on her getting her all worked up and then he leaves the room and a much older (Sean Connery look-alike) man comes into the room and disrobes and she's struggling to get free because she never agreed to have this man fuck her but that's what it appears is about to happen. I think there are a few other good scenes but those are the best and obviously, you're not going to watch it for the storyline...duh...you're just going to skip to the hot sex scenes.

Felicity
I remember recording this one when it was on the Cinemax After Dark and up until that point, I couldn't remember seeing a hotter movie with more sex scenes than Felicity. (Although, Felicity isn't much to look at and the guys aren't much to look at, either.) The sleezeball that she has the hots for takes her for a drive out to the middle of nowhere to have sex with her and you find out this is her first time and jerk that he is, he is very rough with her (I don't think "date rape" was a functionable term yet) and ends up screwing her on the hood of his car. I think the words he said to her were, "I want you to lay back on the car, lift your skirt and spread your legs slightly." And then of course you hear her yelping and turning her head in shame and then after that she becomes a whore wanting to screw everything in sight. I guess you could call this a coming of age movie. It's narrated in the first person and this one you really should watch all the way through from beginning to end because even when there aren't actual sex scenes, 95% of the movie is still relating to sex in some fashion or another. Another great scene is where she's at a massage parlor and she's watching her girl friend give a full body massage to someone - by rubbing her completely nude, oiled down body against the other person (I don't remember if it was a girl-girl scene or a girl-guy scene, but it was pretty damned hot either way) and then as Felicity is watching, a guy comes up behind her, puts his hand over her mouth and starts pumping into her. So she's getting off from the combination of watching her friend pleasure a stranger while a stranger is pleasuring her. In my opinion, this would be a GREAT movie to re-make with some hot actors and actresses this time around...because the content is there...oh, buddy, is it there! But we're not talking very much eye candy...and that's a bit of a distraction. Unfortunately, when I taped this, it was towards the end of the tape and having rewound it so many times, the tape is getting pretty thin. So I may need to buy a copy when it comes out on dvd. And obviously, this is not to be confused with the tv show Felicity. :]

House Of The Rising Sun
This one has a pretty cool story because it's about a writer who is doing a piece on upper class call girls and in order to get the scoop, she goes deep undercover and becomes one, herself. The most fascinating thing about this movie is that all of their clothing is either black or white. No reds, no blues, no yellows, etc. And the scenery is really cool. First time I saw it I couldn't stop salivating over the thought of someday possibly owning a pool like the one they had. Not very many sex scenes but one that stands out in my mind is where the man in charge is getting ready to give her a test run and he's standing behind her and brushes her long brunette locks aside to kiss her neck and as he feels her tremble uncomfortably underneath him, he more or less tells her that THAT behavior is not allowed. Then the next scene you see him cutting off her long beautiful locks and she's left with a short shag hairdo...supposedly more elegant, but now her shyness was removed with her hair and that's when she becomes more like the other girls where saying no is not an option. (My opinion, unless you're really into the story and you want to find out who the killer was of all the murdered girls, it's really best to turn off the movie once her hair gets whacked off because that's when she's no longer much to look at.)

Crystal Heart
Back in the day I wanted to look just like Tawny Kitaen and this was probably her best movie. Granted, she's not that great of an actress because she tends to over enunciate everything, and always got stuck with crappy storylines but portraying a singer/dancer who falls in love with a boy in a glass box, it was a sweet love story with a very strange sex scene. Since I have never had sex rubbing up against a piece of glass with someone on the other side, I can't say for sure if it would even feel like anything (if you've done this, please feel free to share with the class), but the way they filmed it, at the time, it was kinda sultry...in a weird sorta way. Either way, she looked DAMNED good in this movie and just picturing myself with her body, and her gorgeous red mane, wearing the cool clothes she was wearing, it made for some good fantasies. One of the famous lines I remember is after she has fallen in love with the guy she can't be with and her manager wants her to be grateful for getting her a show at The Roxy, he pushes her down on the bed and at first she struggles but he pins her and she stops struggling and tells him: "Go ahead and fuck me. Just let me know when you're done." As I'm sure you can imagine, she gets a slap across the face for that comment, but is able to get away from him and eventually finds herself in the arms of the man she loves and of course being in a bubble all his life, he breaks out to be with her and they experience everything together and life is beautiful and wonderful yada yada yada until obviously he dies. And it's a hokey ending, but I liked the song she sings at the end so much that I tape recorded it by holding my radio in front of the tv speaker (that's how we did it back then) and I must have sung that song 100 times. It was a bit upsetting to find out that she didn't actually sing it and the lip synching in the movie isn't that great, but as a whole, this movie provided lots of eye candy, cool tunes, and an interesting way to have sex.

I know there are more movies out there that are softcore that had a major impact on my life, but these are the ones that stick out the most....and I've probably seen the most number of times. But enough about what does it for me. Let me know which ones "moved" you so we can discuss.

Vixy :]